Katie: I forgot to mention how interesting I found Parveen’s definition of hero! Is this what you mean when you say Mark is your hero? And what do you think “space to be” means for you?

MamaRe

Love that creates space – family

: “Space to be” is an elegant idea in marriage and family – by that I mean it is simple, but has profound consequences.

I will use Parveeen’s example:
When I put a delicious, healthy meal on the table for my husband and family – every day – on time – consistently – without complaining….I give them the space to do other things. There are so many things they don’t have to think of…will I eat, will I eat healthy, when will I eat, is everyone basically happy and content.

If your husband has pressure at work and must come in late – does he have to worry about whether or not the children have been fed on time, whether they have their homework done, have had their baths and have been put to bed on time and happily. Is the house in order physically and emotionally? When it is, he has the space to do the work asked of him.

When my husband works hard – and he has worked so hard for many years – and provides physically for all our family needs – consistently and without complaining – I have the room to pursue other things.

As men and women, when we give to the marriage and family our best gifts – and when we do those things CONSISTENTLY and WIHTOUT COMPLAINING, we give our family the space to explore and grow.

There is a study in child development that illustrates this nicely. In the study there were two groups, securely attached babies and insecurely attached babies (I won’t take the time to define terms here). They were all put in a room with their mothers and toys scattered around. Of course all of them clung to their mothers initially, but quickly, the securely attached infants began to explore. They explored more quickly and further than the insecurely attached babies. The conclusion of the study was that securely attached babies did not need to worry whether or not their base (mama) was going to leave. They KNEW she would still be there if they went exploring. The insecurely attached babies clung to mama not knowing if she would be there when they got back.
If you use Parveen’s terms, the insecurely attached babies literally had less space.

Let me know your thoughts…
yours

truly mama re

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